i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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