When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
