Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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