Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(410): View more from Maryland

Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.

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(410): Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight. http://tfl.nu/1lc5

Replies (6) Good night (4521) Bad night (712)
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(401): View more from Rhode Island

I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.

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(401): I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls. http://tfl.nu/rm2y

Replies (35) Good night (3394) Bad night (950)
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(414): View more from Wisconsin

dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.

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(414): dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian. http://tfl.nu/yfk0

Replies (17) Good night (4264) Bad night (611)
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(401): View more from Rhode Island

Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.

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(401): Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face. http://tfl.nu/uer3

Replies (61) Good night (1130) Bad night (4435)
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(443): View more from Maryland

I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now

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(443): I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now http://tfl.nu/gk88

Replies (8) Good night (4218) Bad night (667)
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(307): View more from Wyoming

i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was

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(307): i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was http://tfl.nu/vjju

Replies (4) Good night (1024) Bad night (3971)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone

(1-203): View more from Connecticut

whose oscar?

(203): View more from Connecticut

the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.

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(203): Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone (1-203): whose oscar? (203): the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month. http://tfl.nu/bpyh

Replies (29) Good night (8897) Bad night (862)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me

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(203): I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me http://tfl.nu/osg9

Replies (45) Good night (7991) Bad night (1198)
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(443): View more from Maryland

Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.

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(443): Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed. http://tfl.nu/vazj

Replies (8) Good night (2311) Bad night (1028)
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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?

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(814): Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects? http://tfl.nu/389h

Replies (35) Good night (2354) Bad night (864)
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(417): View more from Missouri

Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.

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(417): Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently. http://tfl.nu/jfkc

Replies (11) Good night (2293) Bad night (569)
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(240): View more from Maryland

She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.

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(240): She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am. http://tfl.nu/ir0l

Replies (19) Good night (806) Bad night (1286)
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(419): View more from Ohio

How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?

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(419): How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter? http://tfl.nu/8q8x

Replies (4) Good night (600) Bad night (903)
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(276): View more from Virginia

Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.

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(276): Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees. http://tfl.nu/acn4

Replies (8) Good night (1193) Bad night (372)
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(479): View more from Arkansas

Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?

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(479): Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends? http://tfl.nu/q9dz

Replies (2) Good night (377) Bad night (578)

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