just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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