I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
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