u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
