What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
