Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Randomize
