I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
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