Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
Success! We fucked roommates!
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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