Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
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