I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
