Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
it's like heaven, but drunker
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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