Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Randomize
