just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
