You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
This baby is an asshole
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Randomize
