turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Randomize
