look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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