I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
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