Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
