I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
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