So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Randomize