i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize
