I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
