also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
