My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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