Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I got inside last night via doggy door
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
