just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
Randomize
