I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
