You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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