I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
23 Bosses Confess The Craziest Thing They’ve Seen An Employee Do
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
19 People Confess What It’s Like To Have Sex With Someone That Is Transitioning
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads