I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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