She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
ugly people sure do ruin things
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
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