You don't have asthma, your pregnant
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Sorry my hands just texted you
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
