i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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