This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
It's rum buckets o'clock
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
