remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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