me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
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