Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
