Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
