My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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