Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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