watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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