i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
