i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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