bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
