The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
i believe in u and ur pee
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Randomize
