i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
