WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
